An Agreement Is Voluntary Only…

An Agreement Is Voluntary Only…

In divorce and family law court cases (including but not limited to: child custody, visitation, child support, spousal support, equitable distribution, and modifications) clients are always asking what can we do to make the other settle and agree.  The answer is simple: “nothing.” If the other side could be made to agree, we would not […]

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Setting The Record Straight, Is It Material And Relevant?

Setting The Record Straight, Is It Material And Relevant?

So, you are in a divorce action or going through a custody or support proceeding and the other side lied or misstated the true facts.  The decision went against you.  Now you believe it was because of the untruths set forth by the other side.  You want to try to reopen it if for no […]

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Tried to Fool Them, But Tricked Ourselves; When Not Getting Married is Getting Married

Tried to Fool Them, But Tricked Ourselves; When Not Getting Married is Getting Married

Unlike some other states in this nation, New York does not recognize “common law marriage.” Common law marriage is a form of legal marriage that arises out of situations that did not include a wedding ceremony. Two examples from two other states would be (1) living together for seven years or more and holding each […]

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Frivolous Litigation Must be Stopped.

Frivolous Litigation Must be Stopped.

In divorce and custody cases, on Long Island and elsewhere, too often the litigation is merit less and frivolous just to accumulate billings for the lawyer, and/or bitter emotions to be vented by the client in the hope of vindication or punishing the other client. The courts usually do nothing to put a stop to […]

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Woozles: Their Role in Custody Law Reform, Parenting Plans, and Family Court

Woozles: Their Role in Custody Law Reform, Parenting Plans, and Family Court

  Linda Nielsen Wake Forest University In the international debates on custody law reform and in individual custody decisions in families and in courts worldwide, social science research is often misused and abused. In this article I describe the process by which data can become distorted in ways that steer policymakers, family court personnel, and […]

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Shared Residential Custody: Review of the Research (Part II of II)

Shared Residential Custody: Review of the Research (Part II of II)

 BY DR. LINDA NIELSEN CHARACTERISTICS OF SHARED PARENTING FATHERS An issue raised in regard to shared parenting is that these fathers are somehow “better” than other fathers to begin with. If this is true, then whatever benefi ts are associated with shared parenting might have accrued even if these children had lived mainly with their […]

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Shared Residential Custody: Review of the Research (Part I of II

Shared Residential Custody: Review of the Research (Part I of II

DR. LINDA NIELSEN Part I of this two-part article focuses on major concerns relating to shared residential custody, the children’s perspective, parental confl ict, and cooperation and income. Part II will discuss characteristics of fathers, outcomes for children (e.g., academic and behavioral), and stability of shared parenting. The studies referenced in both parts appear at […]

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Words Of Caution To Parents in Child Custody and Visitation situations:

Words Of Caution To Parents in Child Custody and Visitation situations:

Do not try to micro manage the other parent’s time and relationship with the children during visitation.  It is not up to you, even if you have custody of the children, what they may or may not do when together unless there is an actual danger or harm to the children objectively speaking, not in […]

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Taking Responsibility And Following Your Lawyers Advise:

Taking Responsibility And Following Your Lawyers Advise:

Your lawyer gives you advise to protect you from your adversary and the Court.  Sometimes, you need to be protected from yourself as well.  But if you are paying your lawyer the big bucks, there is a reason for it.  You should listen to what your lawyer tells you and follow the advise.  If you […]

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Parental Responsibility is all about the children, not about the adult!

Parental Responsibility is all about the children, not about the adult!

There is a difference between fit custodial parenting and negligent guardianship. A parent who does not make their own child’s safety primary could be guilty of parental neglect or inadequate guardianship. Not being in a pool with your child when your young child is in the pool could be one such instance. Sitting or standing […]

Divorce, custody, orders of protection and social media:

Divorce, custody, orders of protection and social media:

When we go through a divorce, child custody proceeding, and/or a domestic violence case, we should NOT litigate it on social media. Leave all ligation to the lawyers and the courtroom. You’d be surprised how often what you post is printed out and used against people in court. Further, you alienate your own friends and […]

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What is a model custodial parent?

What is a model custodial parent?

In short, a model custodial parent always: encourages a good relationship between the children and the other parent; never bad mouths the other parent; includes the other parent in all major decisions concerning the children whether required or not; keeps the other parent informed on all issues concerning the child(ren).   What is an unfit […]

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It just does not matter, so get over it!

It just does not matter, so get over it!

In divorce cases, too many people want to make sure the Judge knows why the marriage failed and that it is the other spouse’s fault.  Unless it goes to custody, i.e., drug abuse, alcohol abuse, domestic violence, and so on, the judge does not care because the law does not care.  It does not matter […]

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Let’s look at discovery in divorce

Let’s look at discovery in divorce

In a divorce proceeding, the parties must exchange with each other and file with the court a sworn statement of net worth (snw).  This is a document signed under oath setting forth your expenses, income, assets and liabilities.  It is a document that you could easily help someone else fill in, yet for some reason, […]

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Equitable Distribution in Divorce Over Simplified

Equitable Distribution in Divorce Over Simplified

To understand equitable distribution, the division of assets and debts acquired during the marriage, one must first understand the two most important terms used: Marital property:  all property acquired during the marriage that is not separate property of either spouse. Separate property:  all property acquired by either spouse prior to the marriage, acquired by inheritance, […]

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Orders of Protection Info You Need to Know

Orders of Protection Info You Need to Know

Once there is a stay away order of protection against you, no one can change it except for a Judge in the Court that issued it.  So, if there is an order of protection against you, a signed agreement between you and the other person and/or between your respective lawyers that something, even to appear […]

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Support Info You Need to Know

Support Info You Need to Know

Support Info You Need to Know Child support laws in this state are cold and calculating (pun intended). But what most people do not realize is that the due date for child support is a due date, not a mail by date. Thus, for example, if your support payment is due on the 1st of […]

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Pull the rug out fast and early!

Pull the rug out fast and early!

  Divorce is too often litigated on emotions that jack up legal fees beyond what is actually necessary. This is only good for the lawyers, not you or your spouse and especially not for your children. So, when a litigious lawyer who likes to bill it up has a client who feels “scorned” and wants […]

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Keep it Civil, Not Stupid.

Keep it Civil, Not Stupid.

Going through a divorce can be extremely difficult, especially if there are children involved and issues of custody and visitation. However, the key is to always put the children first and keep their best interests in mind. Spouses should discuss and agree on how to make it easier for their children during the process and […]

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Do Not Play Tit For Tat, Always Have Clean Hands

Do Not Play Tit For Tat, Always Have Clean Hands

Too many litigants want to play tit for tat in their divorce case, do NOT  play that game, here’s why: In the discovery phase of pre trial litigation of a divorce or support matter, too often a client’s says: “I refuse to produce financial documents until the other side does.  Well, if the other side […]

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Advice for Courtroom Success

Advice for Courtroom Success

The symbols of the American court system are the scales of justice. As such, people mistakenly believe that truth and justice are the pillars of this hallowed structure. However, I am here to tell you that truth and justice, as you understand them, only exist in superhero comic books. It does not exist in real […]

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Divorces are for parents, not children

Divorces are for parents, not children

When it comes to dealing with couples in the midst of divorcing, undoubtedly the most difficult issue to contend with involves children. No matter how difficult dissolving a marriage is for adults, this transition that much harder for the kids, even under the most non-contentious circumstances. Yet, throughout the divorce process – and after – […]

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16 Things I’ve Learned in 16 Years of Practice

16 Things I’ve Learned in 16 Years of Practice

Anniversaries take on new meanings when you are a divorce lawyer. To me, one of the proudest accomplishments in my career was going back to school to obtain my bachelors degree and then my law degree while raising my daughter as a sole custodial parent and earning a living all at the same time. I […]

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Bankruptcy and Divorce

Bankruptcy and Divorce

Although the economy is showing signs of recovery, chances are you’ve experienced some degree of hardship in the last few years – especially if you have gone through or are going through – a divorce. Very few come through the divorce process economically unscathed, so rest assured that you’re in good company. But if the […]

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A New Year and a Fresh Start

A New Year and a Fresh Start

There is a popular adage that January has the highest rate of divorce filings. There is likely some truth to this, though I’m not confident the statistics necessarily demonstrate this reality. Anecdotally, there have been years in my practice where this certainly appears to be the case. I’m not confident that this is particular to […]

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Spousal Abuse: Domestic Violence in New York State

Spousal Abuse: Domestic Violence in New York State

Witnessing the effects of spousal abuse is one of the worst aspects of my practice. Abuse takes many shapes and can be attributed to both men and women in a relationship; this parity is something not often spoke about in the media and many men are afraid to admit that they too have been victims […]

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Child Support and Unemployment or Loss of Income

Child Support and Unemployment or Loss of Income

The Dow Jones Industrial Average is at an all-time high as of this writing. Even if you’re reading this blog post months from when it was originally published, the market is likely far above where it was when the financial markets collapsed in 2008. Yet for all of Wall Street’s flowing champagne and expensive caviar, […]

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Fathers’ Rights in New York

Fathers’ Rights in New York

Understanding fathers’ rights is the foundation of my practice because I have lived the process having been a dad who went through a custody battle before I became an attorney. I have also seen the topic evolve over the past 20 years or so in both the legal arena and in people’s minds. Many of […]

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